I Ain't Down Yet...But...

I find myself struggling during this open-ended time of waiting during the Pandemic of COVID-19.  I'm a highly organized person. As a director and theatre educator, schedules, deadlines and calendars rule.  I am also a problem solver.  I don't give up easily.  In high school, I was Molly in The Unsinkable Molly Brown.  My mantra is "I ain't down yet." But right now all bets are off. What happens when the show can't go on?

I remember a line from the play, I Never Saw Another Butterfly, the true story that bears witness to the children interned in Terezin during the Holocaust.  Irena, the teacher who inspires and motivates her students to write poetry and draw pictures about their experience, says to young Raja, "waiting days are long days."

These are long days.  I am waiting, like everyone, for this to be over. But that is not likely to happen any time soon.  Given the reality, what does that mean for my students who have rehearsed and were ready to perform their spring musical, Into the Woods in April?  At what point do I holler uncle?
I'm walking a fine line between tenacity and insanity.

We are not returning to school for the rest of the year. I have given up on the notion that we will be able to perform for a live audience. So what choices are left?   I've envisioned everything from the actors coming back when it is safe - maybe late summer  or even over Thanksgiving - performing with clear face shields. The cast members could apply their makeup, do their hair, dress in costume and warm up at home.  But is that even feasible?

There are a million dominoes. The set is installed but nothing has been teched. No light cues have been programmed.  Does this make sense? Or would we be better off figuring out a way to do an audio recording of the cast?  These students deserve some kind of "finished product," don't they?
Or is this just another casualty of COVID-19.  Another loss for the class of 2020?

I don't know. Will the answers come? At some point will the answer be obvious? Will it be dictated to me? Somebody, anybody, tell me what to do!?

Unwinding the show will have its own set of complications - set, props, costume returns. Negotiating contracts. Retrieving musical scripts and scores. What else?  I don't know what I don't know.
But what will the emotional toll be on those kids?

Waiting to mount the show some time in the future without any idea of when that might be seems unreasonable. Reassembling a cast that would then include graduates,  reinstalling the set, re-assembling the costumes.... at what expense? Is that even possible?

I always say, "safety first." This is the ultimate, "heads up!" call.
We cannot do the show until it is safe to do so.  That line is clear.
How long to hold on to a full scale production is not so clear. When do you cut your losses, regroup and create something lasting in a different way?

Waiting days are indeed long days.  I ain't down yet...but it's feeling like the iceberg is on the horizon.
I'm willing to row. But where is the life boat?